Safety First

If you want to use the courts or police to protect yourself, you need to document what is happening to you so that it can be presented as evidence in court.

Keep track of:

 all incidents of harassment of threat
 the feelings you experience about it
 measures you have taken to protect yourself

You can do this in a journal or diary; or you can keep a log especially for stalking. Shelter staff may also assist in documenting if we see him around the shelter. In keeping track; be sure to record:

 Date and Time
 Description of the Incident
 Any Witnesses – names, addresses and telephone numbers
 Whether you phoned the Police

Do’s and Dont’s for Protecting Yourself

DO

  • Avoid all contact with the stalker and do not respond to the stalker once you’ve told him NO.

  • Tell people what is happening to you and the danger you feel

  • Tell other the importance of keeping your phone number and address secret

  • Keep everything the stalker sends you on file and try to tape telephone messages

  • Keep a diary of approaches, calls, letters and incidents to do with the stalking

  • Report the staking to the police. Try not to be discouraged if they don’t respond the way you want.

  • Listen to soft music

DON'T

  • Ignore what is happening to you or keep it a secret

  • Minimize or underestimate the danger you may be in

Look Out For These Guys

Pay attention to behaviour that doesn’t seem or feel right

  • Guys who don’t listen to you, ignore you or talk over you. These guys have no respect for women.
  • Guys who sit or stand too close to you, make you feel uncomfortable and enjoy making you feel this way.
  • Guys who POWER STARE – You know – when a guy is looking right through you or down at you.
  • Guys who do only what they want or push or grab you to get what they want
  • Guys who express anger and violence towards women either through words (i.e.. Bitch, I’m going to kill you…) or by pushing, shoving or biting
  • Guys with a bad attitude toward women (i.e.. Women are meant to be seen and not heard…a woman’s place is in the kitchen so she can serve a man…)
  • Guys who are overly jealous or possessive – these guys can be very controlling
  • Guys who drink or use drugs heavily
  • Guys with a reputation for scoring. They are likely to pressure you for sex when you go out with them

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